Hi everyone - I’m Matt and wanted to set up Dry Spell as a place, community and area to normalise sober socialising. It’s no secret just how alcohol centric our British society is (albeit it’s becoming less so, but more on that another time) and I felt this much more starkly when I stopped drinking.
I stopped drinking totally in July 2021 having had tactical breaks previously.
I would always drink socially, both with work and friends. But I was only drinking because that’s just what happened, not because I actually wanted to. I felt as if the choice was not there; that I had to drink to have fun, to maintain my relationships and to fit in. I would never drink at home, but practically every other occasion would have alcohol involved as a result of that pressure.
So I decided to take the choice back; claim back the independence that I had lost to alcohol over many years through most of my 20s. I didn’t want to drink any more; I often had brain fog, was lethargic, lacked clarity of thought and wanted to drop a social crutch that I knew was not healthy for me long term.
Making the final decision to stop drinking was exciting, but it hit me like a ton of bricks trying to live my old life in the same way, just without the alcohol. Alcohol was everywhere I looked and I almost instantly felt isolated, lonely and frustrated, that what I thought was a positive life choice, was leaving me feeling worse off. Reactions were varied, on the whole people are positive and supportive, but there is an underlying societal norm (especially in men I believe, more on that later) that makes you stick out like a sore thumb.
This drove me to set up Dry Spell, because it should be totally normal if someone doesn’t want to drink, occasionally or ever. No one should feel weird, left out, isolated or judged for what is, in reality, a fairly minor lifestyle choice. If this group can make 1 person feel better about themselves and life choices, then that’s what this is all about.
Over time things have gotten easier and much better for me personally, and I genuinely will never drink again, because I can see it adds nothing to my life that I can’t have or achieve whilst not drinking. Having the visible side by side comparison shows me clearly that I won’t go back.
I would love to hear from as many people as possible who have had similar or totally different experiences to me! So please do drop me a message on matt@dryspell.uk or find us on insta @dry.spell.uk
Matt.
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